Calgary Jeep Association

Author Topic: I love telemarketers...  (Read 1870 times)

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Offline Black Betty

  • UberWheeler
  • Posts: 453
I love telemarketers...
« on: March 29, 2011, 06:35:53 AM »
Bit of a long read but I thought I'd share with you guys a little fun I had with a telemarketer.  I got a call from Direct energy on sat and this is how it went.

Adrian: hello?

De: hello may I speak with the owner of the house?

Adrian: That's me!

De:  hello sir, I am so and so from direct energy,  the reason I am calling today is to ensure that you are safe from escalating energy rates, now where do you currently get your gas from?

Adrian:  well, sometimes esso, but mostly shell cause they have air miles.

De: no sir, I ment the natural gas for your heating and hot water.

Adrian: hmm you know I'm not quite sure.

De:  well where do you get your electricity from?

Adrian:  I have a grey box on the side of the house with a white dial thingy on it, I'm pretty sure I get I from there.

(little bit of a pause here)

De:  ok sir in order for you to take advantage of this offer I must understand where you currently get your energy from, can you tell me if you have a pink or white bill?

Adrian:  ummm, I really don't want to be taken advantage of, that definately doesn't sound like fun..

De:  no sir!  Take advantage of, not taken advantage of! Maybe this service isn't for you sir.

Adrian: you mean I won't get taken advantage of???

De: no sir

Adrian:  that's good, l guess I don't really need what your offering then do I?

De: no sir

(left a little pause here)

Adrian:  can I still get my gas at shell?

De:  yes sir

Adrian:  what about petro Canada?  They are red and white, I like red, red is a fast colour  Can I get gas there too?

De:  yes sir.

Adrian:  all right then, have a good one eh?

De:  thank you, you too sir....

Click!
06 wk-soccer mom mobile aka Betty J
99 xj- Black Betty, 2" OME lift
94 yj- needs to be lifted aka Betty Rubble

Stupid hurts

Offline Brooneg

  • Budget Lift
  • Posts: 200
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #1 on: March 29, 2011, 10:57:37 AM »
That's GREAT!!   The other one I like is
 caller.."Sorry Did I wake you up?"
Me  "Nope, Had to answer the phone anyway"

Offline tubby

  • Talks waaay too much!
  • Posts: 1349
  • Life's too short for a fulltime job
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #2 on: March 29, 2011, 01:12:34 PM »

That's pretty good...

I usually don't have the heart to tell telemarketers to fu@% -off so I try to engage them in dirty-talk.

telemarketer: " Hi my name is Tim and I'm with the Calgary Herald. Can I interest you in a yearly subscription to our fantastic paper?"

me:  " What are you wearing Tim and what time do you get off of work?" [panting] "Tim?"....."You still there big guy?"

You call my house at suppertime and you get what you get...
Lockers
Cuz ya can't kick arse with only one leg

Offline dunl

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  • Posts: 1895
    • Red Deer Jeep Packrats
`48 CJ2A, `54 CJ3B, `97 TJ, and 03 WJ...batting close to .500 when it comes to jeep models owned vs. jeep models created.....
Red Deer Jeep Packrats
www.reddeerjeep.com

Offline Traktor

  • Baby Wheeler
  • Posts: 62
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #4 on: March 29, 2011, 02:51:49 PM »
I like that, don't know if I could pull it off without laughing, but I do like it.

I usually try to sell them something, like a crazy piece of art, or some crack.

1995 Cherokee Country (Kaw-liga) - Way too much chrome, but just enough red.

Offline dunl

  • Talks waaay too much!
  • Posts: 1895
    • Red Deer Jeep Packrats
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #5 on: March 29, 2011, 03:39:37 PM »
Usually I ask them first if they know how much the fine is for calling someone on the Do Not Call list, and then ask them for their employee number and supervisor's name so I can forward it to the appropriate government official for legal action to commence. 

Never had one last longer than 20 seconds when I do that.
`48 CJ2A, `54 CJ3B, `97 TJ, and 03 WJ...batting close to .500 when it comes to jeep models owned vs. jeep models created.....
Red Deer Jeep Packrats
www.reddeerjeep.com

Offline 4PLAYZJ

  • UberWheeler
  • Posts: 423
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #6 on: March 29, 2011, 09:13:39 PM »
I like to tell them that I am very interested but I have to finish my call on the other line.  I then ask them if they will hold, if they say yes I put them on hold and never pickup again.  It is kind of fun to see how long they will hold for.

Offline LLYJ

  • UberWheeler
  • Posts: 350
  • carport ghetto fab
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #7 on: March 30, 2011, 09:24:41 AM »
I liked Jerry Seinfeld's approach

Jerry -  yes, but I'm busy right now, can I have your home phone number so I can call you back later,....ohh,.. you don't want ot be called at home,...me either !!! and then hangs up the phone.

Or Danny Devito in Ruthless People - hilarious but probably a little to direct and graphic for this site LOL
51 Willys CJ3A - V6, SM420, T18, D44/27 lockers
93 YJ, starting to see light at the end of the carport
98 ZJ, 5.2l - DD with too many go go gadgets
05 Dodge 2500HD hauler

Offline Jeepless

  • Budget Lift
  • Posts: 113
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #8 on: March 30, 2011, 10:02:55 AM »
I thought I'd joke around once with a tele marketer and ended up with 3 RCMP cars at my house!

Got a call for some life insurace company once. Caller asked for me and I said just a sec. Setting the phone down I hollared to the air, "Hey Manny are you done cutting him up yet? Your wanted on the phone." I came back on the phone and the caller was gone. Thought great! Got rid him of easily. Well about 20 min later I had cops all over my house! Needless to say they we'nt amused but it was all good in the end.

Offline parabs

  • That CB Yapper
  • Posts: 504
Re: I love telemarketers...
« Reply #9 on: March 30, 2011, 05:35:18 PM »
http://www.performance-shop.com/showthread.php?t=44710&highlight=gold+cash

You might have to be a member to see the pic, but it is well worth the time to register..

It isnt a telemarketer, but it is in the same ballpark..and I think it is incredible.
2000 TJ Sahara - Sold
2006 Lincoln Mark LT - Bassani Exhaust
2007 Harley Davidson F150 - Nothing to note.